The Theft of 2007
To say that the monster trade of September 19, 2007 was not the turning point of the season would be like saying 9/11 and Jews are actually imaginary characters that live in banks and headquarter of major corporations (and Hollywood). The dramatic effects of this trade are still being felt around the league, and will continue to be felt into next season.
Let’s recap the events of 9/19.
Zou sends Travis Henry, Larry Fitzgerald, Calvin Johnson, Kellen Winslow and Derrick Mason to Wannabees.
Wannabees send Steven Jackson, Adrian Peterson, Marvin Harrison, Braylon Edwards and Vernon Davis to Zou.
At the time, the NFL was on the verge of entering week three of the season. To put it in perspective, KC was 0-2 and in last place. Since, they are 4-2 and are in first place. California has burnt to the ground. Jeff Guiot was not considered a man who cursed. SBU had just blown a 7 point fourth quarter lead to fall to 0-3. KU was not ranked. I could only name two KU football players (I can name more now - sorta). Major League Baseball was still in the regular season. The Mets were still in first place. The Rockies had just won their fourth game in what would be the beginning of a 21 wins in 22 games stretch. I didn’t have a subscription to Rivals.com.
Now, today, Henry is on his was to the suspension list; Fitzgerald is struggling with a third string QB; keeper prospects Calvin Johnson, Braylon Edwards and Kellen Winslow are spearheading a resurging Inoculator franchise; Vernon Davis sucks; Steven Jackson and Marvin Harrison are injured; the best running back in the NFL, Adrian Peterson, is bringing a dormant Zou team to life.
Oh how so much has changed.
Consider what the Zou has done with the five players he received in the Theft of 2007:
Traded Marvin Harrison (along with McNabb and White) for Willie Parker and traded Braylon Edwards (with Kenton Keith) for Reggie Bush and Santonio Holmes.
These moves allowed him to trade Larry Johnson, Lee Evans, Kevin Jones and Jon Kitna for Peyton Manning and Marion Barber III.
The addition of the Titans D completed a total reformation of what was once an 0-5 roster. Armed with an arsenal of big play running backs, the third rated QB, two steady receivers and a consistent D, the Zou is now primed to make a serious playoff run.
And waiting in the wings? The return of Marvin Harrison and preseason second-rated player Steven Jackson.
As for keepers? How about choices of 8th rated Marion Barber at a cost of a 4th round pick, 12th rated Holmes at a 11th round pick and top rated Peterson at a 9th round pick?
*****
Another team has benefited from this trade as well. The Inoculators, who started at 0-4, are now in the midst of five game winning streak and on the verge of making a playoff run. Two keys? The Zou’s trade Edwards for Bush and Holmes, and a desperately needy Wannabee team trading Calvin Johnson and Kellen Winslow for Jones-Drew.
The trade has also set up the Inoculators for next season, who will have to choose between 6th round pick Winslow, 8th round pick Edwards, 10th round pick Johnson and 12th round pick Greg Jennings.
*****
But, alas, there losers in this trade. And these losers are in the midst of very dark times.
The one with the most hope is Team Winckler. Sitting at 6-0, Team Winckler seemed unbeatable. Then, Miami running back Ronnie Brown suffered a season-ending injury, leaving Winckler scrambling for a replacement.
Initially, Winckler seemed to have his head on straight. Seeing that he had an elite quarterback in Peyton Manning, a touchdown machine in Barber, a young running back in Lynch, promising wide receivers Marques Colston (who he had just received in a brilliant trade), Dwayne Bowe and Patrick Crayton, and the anticipated return of Hines Ward, Winckler decided he would trade Steve Smith.
Smith was at the hight of his value and had just had a 28 point fantasy day. Trading him for a solid back seemed very likely given he had just traded Kevin Curtis for Colston.
That is when evil knocked on Winckler’s door (or e-mail or something like that). The Zou saw an opportunity to bait him with declining running back Larry Johnson - a deal he could make because of his acquisitions of Parker and Peterson - in order to upgrade at QB.
Winckler took the bait.
Now, Wincker sits at 6-3 and was recently beaten by Manning and Barber despite Winckler scoring a over 157 points.
“I can’t f*****g believe it,” Winckler said, though I have no actual proof that he did say that.
*****
The saddest story of all is yet to come. It is the story of a franchise that once held greatness - but then traded it for Cedric Benson. It is the story of The Wannabees.
The Wannabees were once a proud and talented franchise. They featured players such as Adrian Peterson, Braylon Edwards and T.J. Houshmandzadeh.
Then, as if God had decided that he needed a new Job ("Job" the Bible character, not "Job" as in "I need a job."), the unthinkable happened.
A small trade. Small in stature, but great in realms of history and modern civilization. A trade was approved. The line read as such:
CENT traded Cedric Benson, Chi RB to Wannabees
WESE traded T.J. Houshmandzadeh, Cin WR to Centaurs
It was the fall of this domino that would lead to the beginning of an unforeseen destiny (what the hell does that mean?).
Weak at running back and panicking from an 0-2 start, Weseloh made the trade.
“I didn’t think about it much at the time,” Weseloh did not say. “I thought I had made a good deal. I was gaining the league’s leading rusher (after two weeks - that’s my words, not his… even though these are not his words…yeah.), I was getting a promising wide out in Johnson - although I thought it was CHAD Johnson at the time, not CALVIN - and I thought things were on the way up.”
Oh how wrong he was.
Travis Henry tested positive for a banned substance. The top two quarterbacks in Arizona got injured. Weseloh finally remembered that Steve McNair can’t throw far enough to complete a pass to Derrick Mason and Calvin Johnson hurt his back.
“I panicked,” Weseloh may have said. “I didn’t know what to do. I traded my backup QB (McNabb) for Thomas Jones, thinking I would be getting help at RB. Then I remembered Jones as a Jet sucks. So I decided to steal away Maroney from the gay guy for Jones and Benson. That worked out well until I realized that the Patriots never run. I panicked again and traded Calvin (the guy I thought was Chad Johnson) and Kellen - the only two guys who were doing anything on my team besides Romo - for Maurice Jones-Drew. It worked from the standpoint that Jones-Drew’s 11 points were two more than Henry and Maroney had combined. But I still lost.
“I’m 2-7. My wife left me. The bank has foreclosed on my house. I lost my salvation. I don’t know what to do anymore.”
And the friend, Erik Johnson, owner of The Zou, what did he have to say?
“Jeff who?” Johnson may or may not have said while sitting in his recently purchased Bugatti Veyron 16.4. “Oh yeah, that guy. How’s he doing? Oh, he’s contemplating suicide? That sucks. Well, that should teach him to trade Adrian Peterson, eh? HA! Anyway, I’ve got go buy a beach house in Hawaii. I’m flying there in my new private jet! I’m pumped! Ryan Braun rules!”
Told of Johnson’s comments, Weseloh wept uncontrollably. It got really awkward, so I left him there in his underwear next to a trash bin to wallow in his own tears.
For every success, there is a failure. And failure is a bitch.
Remember 9/19! We Will Never Forget! United We Stand (Against Gay Trades)!
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD PLAY CROYLE!
Someone please explain this to me.
We are rebuilding, but we are trying to win at the same time. We are playing a second-year, seventh-round draft pick at safety. We are playing a second-year, second-round pick at the other safety position. Our left end is in his second year. One outside linebacker is in his third year, and our right end is in his fourth year. Our starting wide receiver is a rookie and the third guy is a second-year guy getting his first snaps. The right guard is being replaced by second-year guy who has never started a game and a rookie running back is expected to see plenty of action against Denver.
But we can’t play Croyle. No way. Then we may lose. He may make a mistake. It could cost us. We may not make the Super Bowl as a result or maybe miss out on the playoffs altogether. No way, we can’t play Croyle.
Huh? Um, so it’s okay when Jared Page costs us a game because he is just a safety. It’s okay for Jeff Webb to cost us a game because he doesn’t realize you need two feet inbounds, not one. It’s okay for Rudy Nuoneknowshowtospellyournameger to give up sacks and tackles for losses in the backfield. It’s okay for Tamba to not read the bootleg. It’s okay for Pollard to blow coverages. It’s okay for Smith to come in and allow two sacks, drop two balls and average 2.6 ypc (that part is in anticipation for next week). It’s okay for Bowe to have to take himself out of the game because he didn’t stretch well enough prior to the GB game.
BUT GOD FORBID CROYLE THROW AN INTERCEPTION!
What the crap?!
This offseason, I honestly thought the Chiefs were going in the right direction. Carl brought in Donnie Edwards to be a leader, to teach the defensive front seven how to succeed. Surtain and Law were there to teach and protect Page and Pollard during their growing pains. The Chiefs had a veteran laden line that could play smart and help recognize certain blitz packages Croyle may miss. LJ, Bennett and Smith would share the carries. Allen could be the project that would be ready to take over for Gonzalez when he left. We accumulated a million picks to spend on the offensive line and corners next season.
All we had to do is start Croyle sometime after the Chicago game and see what we had so we can determine the future of the QB position.
But no.
Croyle has only seen mop up time. Smith has exactly zero carries on a team that has back coming off a 416 carry season and heldout of the entire preseason. Bowe plays, but is never thrown to unless Huard gets him temporarily confused with TG.
Watching the GB game last week, I saw a QB throw two picks, had no running game to help him, zero time to throw the ball, and young receivers learning how play the game. That QB won the game.
Yes, he’s Brett Favre. Yes, he’s the greatest QB of all-time. But the point is that throwing 2 picks, having zero wide receiver threats and no running game doesn’t mean you can’t win.
We send Huard limping out there to hold onto the ball for 20 seconds and take sacks. The man has no intention of throwing the ball unless he sees the number 88 streaking across his line of vision. But as long as he doesn’t throw picks, he’s doing just fine. As long as we average 14 points a game, we’re fine. As long as Huard can stand, we’re fine.
Gay (sorry Tony).
How about this: start Croyle. I’m venturing to bet that we will win the same amount of games with Croyle as we would with Huard. It’s not like Huard is the king of protecting the ball. He’s thrown 9 picks and has a QB rating of 79.1 for crying out loud!
And it’s not like we are in the hardest division in the history of mankind, and it is not as if we have the toughest schedule in the world either.
After Denver at home this week, we go to Indy, host Oakland, host the Chargers, go to Denver, host Tennessee, go to Detroit and go to the Jets. Only three of those teams have winning records, Denver hands out rushing yards like pedophiles hand out candy, the Charges let Peterson run for 296 yards, Tennessee has ZERO offense and is very beatable, Detroit doesn't know what letter “defense” starts with and the Jets flat out suck. And for all intensive purposes, the Indy game was decided in Indy’s favor long before the season started. There really is no need to play that game.
The Chiefs, no matter who is at QB, could easily win six of those games. No joke. I like the matchups against Denver (both times), Oakland, Tennessee and the Jets. I think we have the potential to beat SD again at home (especially if they are coming off four straight losses to Min, Indy, Jacksonville and Baltimore) and I think we can sneak up on Detroit. The Detroit game may not even matter if we beat Denver, Oakland and SD. These are reasonable final standings in the AFC West (I'll even say we only win five games and not six):
KC 9-7 (wins vs. DEN, OAK, SD, @Den, @Jets - losses vs. @Ind, @Ten, @Det)
SD 7-9 (wins vs. DET, DEN, OAK - losses vs. IND, @Jax, BAL, @Kc, @Ten)
DEN 6-10 (wins vs. @Oak, @Hou - losses vs. @Kc, TENN, @Chi, KC, @Sd, MIN)
OAK 4-12 (wins vs. CHI - losses vs. @Min, @Kc, DEN, @Gb, IND, @Jax, SD)
Face it, that is very realistic. And it doesn’t matter who's QB because the AFC West sucks THAT BAD!
And get this, WE WOULD GET A HOME GAME! We may even play Tennessee, a team we could beat! Seriously, isn’t that a PERFECT test for Brodie?
KU y MU Thoughtalones
First, KU, because, unlike mu, KU is undefeated and ranked higher in the BCS (HOLY CRAP! WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!)
Of the two remaining games before the mu/KU showdown, OSU and ISU, the Iowa State game makes me the most nervous.
I think the loss to Texas has killed OSU emotionally for this game. Their season, for all intensive purposes, is done. I understand their offense is good, but I think KU’s D is going to be playing with a chip on their shoulder this week.
Everyone - everyone being the typical college football fan - wants KU to pull a BC and lose. They look at the defense performance against Nebraska and say, “There it is, a hole in Kansas. Now OSU will exploit it and the KU will finally be done and we can start talking about big schools like Oklahoma, Oregon and LSU more.”
But, honestly, isn’t OSU the Nebraska of the South minus the coaching insanity? Well, I guess they did have that Gundy blow up.
OSU’s strength is running the ball, which plays into KU’s defense strength. See the Texas A&M game if you need more evidence. OSU is an average passing team. OSU’s sophomore QB Zac Robinson played out of his mind against Texas, going 30-for-42, 430 yards, 2 Tds and no picks. He still lost. His 30 completions were his highest since completing 19 passes against Sam Houston State. Robinson’s running skills are no better than Texas A&M’s Stephen McGee.
If Talib can lock up Bowman and the KU run defense does what it always does, then KU will be fine. KU will have no problems scoring against this OSU defense.
Iowa State scares me because, well, they’re Iowa State. But if KU beats OSU and they are looking at being undefeated heading into the mu game, I cannot imagine there being a lapse on KU’s part.
As for mu, I think they’ll be just fine. The only stumbling block would be this week against TAM. If A&M can run the ball effectively and keep mu’s insane offense off the field, I think they have a shot. But I still think mu wins.
KSU is interesting in that they have the talent to win, but may not be motivated. If KSU beats Nebraska, which they should, they’ll have six wins and a date with Fresno State at home still left on their calendar. The urgency may not be there for KSU to win. If KSU loses, that would be their third in their last four games, with the one win being against Baylor. This could deflate them and leave them ripe for the picking. Either way, I think it should be a game mu wins.
As a side note, if OSU wins either this week, next week agaist Baylor or at the end of the season against OU, it would give the South five bowl eligible teams. If Colorado can beat Iowa State and Nebraska could somehow beat KSU and CU, it would give the North five bowl eligible teams. I find that interesting for some reason.
PICKS! EARLY AND ON TIME! HOLY CRAP!
BOLD = home, Favorite on left1:00 PM Carolina (4-4) -4½ Atlanta (2-6)
1:00 PM Green Bay (7-1) -6½ Minnesota (3-5)
1:00 PM Kansas City (4-4) -4½ Denver (3-5)
1:00 PM Buffalo (4-4) -2½ Miami (0-8)
1:00 PM New Orleans (4-4) -11½ St. Louis (0-8)
1:00 PM Pittsburgh (6-2) -9½ Cleveland (5-3)
1:00 PM Tennessee (6-2) -4½ Jacksonville (5-3)
1:00 PM Washington (5-3) -2½ Philadelphia (3-5)
4:05 PM Baltimore (4-4) -5½ Cincinnati (2-6)
4:15 PM Arizona (3-5) -1½ Detroit (6-2)
4:15 PM Dallas (7-1) -1½ New York NYG (6-2)
4:15 PM Chicago (3-5) -3½ Oakland (2-6)
8:15 PM Indianapolis (7-1) -3½ San Diego (4-4)
Monday, Nov 12, 2007
8:30 PM Seattle (4-4) -9½ San Francisco (2-6)
AND finally, your moment of Zen (I stole that from the Daily Show)…
No comments:
Post a Comment